How Custard May Actually Take Over the World

There have been some disturbing developments on the custard front. The fun is over. The physicist now fighting at the forefront of knowledge in order to write up the project. Various anomalies in the theories have come to light. Graphs that are supposed to wiggle one way are wiggling in ways only understood by understanders of second order differential equations. And not even by her. In a last ditch attempt to prove the ground-breaking (or should I say custard-breaking) theory she is resorting to having to use various powers that ordinary souls are completely innocent about. Since we are those ordinary souls I will keep you (and myself) in the dark about these powers, let it only be said that there is a great deal of formulae and superscript and strange Greek lettering involved.

But this is not the worst of it, not by far. I have, only today been handed a confidential DVD containing photographic evidence of how Custard may, and probably will, take over the world. Since I don’t believe in the confidentiality of science, I am publishing this herewith.

It started innocently enough with an ordinary school physics lab. A lab usually restricted to the normal pursuit of physics. Actually, no, it started earlier with an innocent physics teacher advising as to the nature of what constitutes an A level physics project. An informative and extensive list of probable, possible and practical conundrums for your probable, possible and practical physics student to undertake. Fine. Fair enough. Good teaching practice. But here was his mistake… he added a small but dangerous coda– ‘I doubt very much if you will be able to come up with anything different from these.’ Fool. Mad idiot. Didn’t he know? My physicist was in his class. Come on man, she’d been there for nigh on two years generally asking difficult questions whist trying to look innocent. It was trouble waiting to happen. Well, we know a lot of the rest http://ceciliamorreau.blogspot.com/2007/04/how-custard-could-save-world.html but these new dangers have only now come to my attention.

This is what happened to the innocent teacher and his innocent teacher friend:




this is what happened to the physics lab (the one in the green is the perpetrator of all this trouble) :


Ok, well this is obviously all bad enough. But it seems contained within the bounds of a secondary school physics lab. Ok, powder and gooey mess not popular with your modern-day over-regulated institute of learning, but surely not a danger. Well, maybe not. But there’s more. Start by carefully observing what is happening behind the well-meaning if a little deranged physicist. Yes, there are two more physicists. No, they are not conducting their own projects. Yes, they are filling balloons with Non-Newtonian liquids. Custard.

So far all innocent fun. But here is where it gets scary. The mad, messy and challenging one in the green lab coat, (by the way I never brought her up to do such things…I did try Barbie dolls and cute dresses, honestly) decided to further the knowledge of science by finding out what happens if you agitate custard.
NEVER AGITATE CUSTARD
This is what happened. It is well spooky. If you are faint-hearted look away now. If you don’t want to know the score also look away now.
If you need to know what present and future dangers are threatening the planet look now:




Score: CUSTARD 328 – GIRL 0
Advice – RUN AWAY. NOW.