The Very Much Possible Repercussions of the Welsh Smoking Ban

Today, as most of the world (or at least our small corner) knows, it became illegal to smoke in a variety of hitherto smoky places in Wales. Of course this will have extraordinarily far-reaching and far-fetched repercussions. Although so far it doesn’t seem to have affected me much, I still failed to understand the five sets of doors that lead from my office to the land where we are allowed to light up.

However the health of smokers is obviously going to be seriously affected in the long term. All this walking considerable distances, possibly up and down remarkably long staircases, in order to find that small corner of the outside that someone has conveniently designated for voluntary inhalation is bound to take its toll. As is all this stepping out of doors into the fresh air and sunshine. Another major concern is the social aspect; all those disparate souls gathered intimately around a small metal bin, well, anything could happen. Leading physicians, health-workers and bods mostly agree that the smoking ban is going to be tremendous for the Welsh smoker, (especially as leading physicians, health-workers and bods are often leading the field in smoking related activities). It is predicted that in less than twenty years time the Welsh smoker could be amongst the fittest, most suntanned, least depressed and most sociable segment of the population. Some are even going so far as to say that the next generation of Welsh people will be solely the descendants of today’s Welsh smoker as everyone else will have died, or at least become chronically infertile, from sick building syndrome, S.A.D. or lack of amusing friends.

So, all you stuffy stay-indoors clean-living sort of folk – get out the Malboros, the Rizlas, the Old Holborn. Join us on the latest craze to sweep the country. Be free, live a little! You have nothing to lose but your lungs.